pssst.

I've got a big news to share and it's been a while since we talked or I blabbered and you listened patiently. I know you missed me (say yes) and I missed this place too. But no wasting of time in telling that to each other because we know that we mean it.

So the news is. ohmygodicant'tbreathe.

I AM PUBLISHING A BOOK!!!

see the flock of birds? they remind me of this place.

My first collection of poems, Udaari is coming out soon, most probably by the end of next month and I am absolutely thrilled and excited and ecstatic and hyperventilating a little too much.

I've been doing so many things, like gazillion things simultaneously. But not complaining at all because however daunting this process may be, I'm thoroughly enjoying this super crazy ride.

Udaari is a word taken from my native language Punjabi. Udaari means to fly, to spread the wings and take a leap, a quiet soar against the wind. Let me know what you think about the name and the cover design. I'd be happy to hear some reviews.

And talking of reviews, if any of my blogger friend who still reads me, loves me and would like to write a review of my first book, let me know and I'd be happy to send you an advance reader copy. Spread the word friends and help me get famous.

In other news, I've also designed a whole new website because I'm trying my best to learn how to be a professional author and many more important things in between. That's a lot of work too by the way. Check out www.writingsofvinati.com and join my mailing list, okay.

Also, I think many of you don't know that I'm super active on my Instagram page and Facebook page. Drop by sometime.

And that's that.

I'll be sharing more updates about this project soon. A book launch is also scheduled but more on that later. For now, let's just allow this news to sink in, that it is all happening. Udaari is happening, for real.

eeeep!

Okay bye.

1 am conversation

How funny is this? As much as we crave change, as much as we desire new, random, beautiful and out of this world experiences, there is always a part of us that wants to go back to where we started from, to stay close to everything familiar, everything that once felt like home.

This is how I've been since past few months. 

I haven't taken a break. I've been writing a lot. I've been reading a lot. I'm well updated in what you guys are up to, what my favorite people are feeling, writing and going through these days and I have a lot to say to you all, so here I go.

It is great to see you back in action Kayla, missed your gorgeous words so much. PeeVee, I am in awe with the way you write bro, how are you so amazing? Oh my god Red, you are back! Did I tell you I stalked you thoroughly when I saw your comment? D your new blog and the name is breathtaking. The last post where you wrote 'Not having something to say shouldn't keep me from writing anymore, I should just write.' I want to thank you for this. Ankita, you woman are shining like a diamond. I am very happy for your latest books love. Soumya, Twisha, Emma, Ridx, Anisha, Keirthana gosh, I missed you ladies (sincere apologies if I've missed out your name). And my readers, both old and new. You make me feel safe, you make me feel at ease whenever I think about this blog and I am incredibly thankful for that. I've realized I get too weepy and sentimental when I write about what this blog has been to me, what you all have been to me and I think the best part is that you being a blogger yourself, can understand this so well. You know there is a mess in our head and it is okay to let it out and feel sooo much at once.

Writing is and will always be the most beautiful form of meditation for me, for us. 

I'm currently more active on another platform, Instagram: @writingsofvinati. It is new, it is fresh, more convenient to handle and it gives me that push to outdo myself every time I read my previous posts. I think I have fallen in love with this art all over again. Writing community is as encouraging on Instagram as it is here. But honestly, I do miss the familiarity of Blogger, the familiarity of having friends who have seen me evolve, seen me grow into a less confused and wayward being. So if you are on Instagram, do drop by and say hi. I would love to see you there.

Lastly, here is my current favorite song for you. This is how you make me feel.

Lana Del Rey: Because of you (unreleased)

I think I should get a tattoo of her name. I'm clearly obsessed.

That's all for now.

I hope to see you on the other side.

_________

6 bullets yada yada

• The new domain www.cometmuse.com is up and working almost fine. It feels great to work on a full-fledged personal website like I'm doing something serious and important, but I'm not. Yay me!
• Why comet muse, because the name resonated with me and my style of writing. No poetic meaning behind, it is what it is. Just felt so right and there cannot be any better reason than that. 
• Started a secondary blog on Tumblr. I think it is important for me to remind myself that I'm not as pathetic as I think. Therefore, Tumblr is only for sharing my personal favorite pieces from this blog. So if you're on Tumblr, drop in some day. I'd love to connect.
• 2015 was officially my poetry reading year. I discovered some beautiful contemporary poets like Nayyirah Waheed, R.M Drake and their work has been an amazing source of inspiration. Honestly, they are the poets who kept me sane throughout the year and therefore, deserve a special mention and a special photo too.

Nayyirah Waheed

• I don't have any plans for twenty sixteen and surprisingly, I'm not freaking out. Is this what growing up feels like?
• Lastly, I am proud to grow into a person who is always the first to forgive and forget. Things become simpler if you just declutter your life and there is no better way than forgiveness. So in case you've been a bitch to me (not you, you are cute), I forgive you because I know you are still growing up.

_________

A very important P.S: My new active email id is cometmuseblog@gmail.com. Let's share some emails, stories and secrets and keep it only between us, okay?

Also, what do you think about this new change?

Mornings with Sinatra

Hello
I am here again.

How have you been? Do you still read me?

Oh, I love you.

I will not say things like 'Gosh, December is here already.' or 'Where did the year go? Was I sleeping the whole time?' or the same old cliched 'Time flies' nonsense. No, time doesn't always fly. Sometimes it just sits like a huge rock in the middle of the road, unwilling to budge, break, move, shift or crawl.

Needless to say, I am glad we are almost done with twenty fifteen and in case no one wants to know, I'm doing good. I'm healthy and fit. Still a lawyer and a self-proclaimed mad poet, surviving the banality of life with the help of Sinatra. Actually, Lana Del Rey too. Remember a month ago I was obsessing over the song High by the beach. Well now it is Music to watch to boys to. I think I have broken my personal record by playing this one on repeat for over a week. I absolutely l.o.v.e this song. Especially when one is in the gym surrounded by insanely hot guys working out, listening to this song makes one feel like the goddamn queen from a classic movie. Now who wouldn't enjoy that!

In other news, I have decided to move. I have decided to replace Mirage. I'm not closing it down, just giving it a new identity. It is quite important for me to be able to connect to this place wholeheartedly like I did in the initial years and I think giving it a new name will surely help.

Presenting to you the new baby blog: Comet Muse

Not sure how long will it be before I incorporate this change. I have so many new ideas for the blog but I have to figure out the painstaking technicalities attached with using a domain name and have to be sure I don't mess up the backlinks. I'll share the new link of the website soon. Hope you would read along. You would, right?

P.S: Sincere apologies for not being able to reply to your comments and emails, life of a lawyer is so not like the one portrayed in Suits. Just saying.
Also, in case you are having a rough day.. here's a picture of my Frodo saying it's all going to be okay.

Would you look at those eyes?!!

Things I have been wanting to share.

• I started this blog just a week before stepping into law school and that was five long years ago. My college life is over, I'm officially a graduate. I'm officially a lawyer!
• I'm growing up too fast and I don't like it at all. Adulthood is scary, it is messed up and there is always too much to do. It's been more than a month since I turned 23 and it is as crazy as it was last year or the year before that. Honestly, I think in my head, I stopped growing up after 16.
• I got a job, like a real job in the real world and I am not yet accustomed to this feeling of having my own visiting cards that say that I'm an Associate. It is a lot to take in and I think I'm going to forget about it for a while.
• My brother visited us in June and gave my parents an out of this world surprise just by appearing one night. It was such a beautiful moment when I saw my mom scream and burst into tears as bhaiya walked in. Dad was in another city, so he refused to believe till we made a video call. And I.. well I managed the whole surprise by keeping the news with myself for two weeks, which was undoubtedly the toughest task. Somebody appreciate me please.
• A few days back, I received a mail which said that in some survey, Mirage has been selected among the Top 15 Personal Blogs in India, and that left me thrilled. To read somebody else's thoughts on my blog, on Mirage, it is a beautiful feeling. Of course, those thoughts have to be beautiful to make that feeling beautiful. eeeeep!
• And and, I'm going to bed now. I wanted to watch Game of Thrones today, but I couldn't because like I said, in grown-ups world, there is always too much to do and it is already midnight. And I have office tomorrow. Uh! Why can't I just refuse to grow up.
• Anyway, it feels great to share this with you.
• Thank you for reading.
• I love you.
• Here's a goodnight kiss.
• Go now.
• Shooo.

The Hey Guy.

I have been wanting to write about a person since many months. It happens every time I hear from him but it slips out of my mind the very next day.

Having been a part of the Facebook world, I have observed that there are usually three kinds of people who appear online on messenger.

1. Those who see your message and go offline immediately.
2. Those who see your message, remain online and choose to ignore you anyway.
3. Those who open a small chat with you once in a while.
4. And then there is this person. Let's call him Mr. X.

Guilty of all of the above mentioned situations, except of course the 4th point.

Mr. X was my classmate in high school. Not a friend, just classmate, like the ones who do not even fall in the category of acquaintances because you know only their names. Never talk to them, never hear their voice.. only their names!

Years ago, I removed him from my friend list for some reason which I gradually forgot. After many months later when I received his request again, I added him and went on with my life. But oh dear god, this guy soon made me realize why I removed him in the first place.

I rarely go online on Facebook because I am not much of a social person. But whenever I go, Mr. X pings me 'Hey'.

Just that!

I see his message and go offline or I see his message and ignore him bluntly, yet he doesn't deter. It's been two years and the trend has continued. I look at the chat history and there is nothing but a series of 'Hey' messages lined up from his side.

It is harmless but at the same time, it is extremely irritating. Like water leaking from the ceiling of your room, drop by drop, testing your patience in every fifty seconds while you sit there cursing it to stop because you just cannot fix it by yourself.

I am extremely curious to know why the hell he is acting like a freak who has no life but there is a part of me which is scared because I don't know what it might stir in the head of an already creepy guy or it might bring down the wall covering some greater menace. So I think I'm just going to wait for him to disappear into oblivion. And that my dear friend, is the master plan.

________

June Chronicles

As life moves on,

I pause to cut off the string that troubles

and tighten the one that once went lose.

June has been hectic but a satisfying month. I traveled more than half of the time and the rest went in writing exams, watching Game of Thrones, sleeping and all that stuff you do when you're bored. Some old relations got renewed and I feel so good about it and some not so old ones got buried deep within the crust of past and I feel good about that too.

The highlight of the month is my visit to my childhood place Kanpur. It was overwhelming to walk on that old aisle, to watch the change which the place underwent and yet how beautifully it held the warmth I went looking for. I don't love the city because it is Kanpur, I love it because my younger self still breathes the air of those narrow streets and whimsical junctures which hold so many stories. I love it because it holds close to the bosom the unadulterated innocence, the incongruous dreams which once blustered through my little head and those nascent aspirations which I had forgotten about.

It was lovely to relive the happy times with my friends there. They are beautiful people and it did not feel like we were meeting after ages. It felt like yesterday. My visit was short.. just two days. But it was enough to rebuilt the lost love.

But before Kanpur, I went on a week long trip to Barot with my college friends. Barot is a beautiful valley in Himachal Pradesh which gave me nth number of bitter sweet memories. It would be unfair to not write a detailed travel post on how amazingly well my trip went in the streets of this less known valley. But that will happen in a few days.

Right now, I'm preparing myself for the next journey. Yes, there is one more place left. But it is not for a vacation. It is for an internship. I will be moving to a new city for the next whole month. Myriad apprehensions are making me go crazy!!! But one thing which I'm really happy about is that I will finally step out of my cocoon and live alone in a new city. It's scary but it's equally exciting too. Wish me luck, my friend.

That's it for now. I missed so many posts of my favorites. Hopefully, if the new city treats me well, I will be regular here again.

Much love.
_______

Picture Source: That's me, somewhere in Barot.

Wish me, it's my happy happy.

I turn 22 tonight and I have an exam in the afternoon. End semester exam. Tough subject. Deja vu! International Trade Law- if you may ask. Not prepared. Cannot do much about it. Nor I want to.
I can't believe 4th June is here again. I'm going to miss being 21. Twenty one is good, it's nice, it's special, it's sexy. But 22 is just plain 22, you know!

But no grumbling. I won't grumble. Because it's my birthday!!!!

Things to remind myself-

• Act my age.
• Keep calm (not like one of those mainstream memes)
• Do not leave the exam incomplete just because it's my birthday. Remember- birthday luck doesn't always work.
• Look pretty, very pretty! One must look pretty even while writing a 3 hour long exam on her birthday. It's a rule.
• Do not whine about how my plans are ruined. It is okay, I will get gifts anyway.
• Accept the fact that I'm not going to be twenty one forever.
• Keep away from negative people. Negative people are sad and they pull you in their sad lives. So keep away from them, not just today but for the rest of my life.
• Ask everyone to wish me. It's also a rule. Moreover, I need love.
• Celebrate happiness and shout out loud that Mirage is listed among the top Indian blogs 2013-14 (see that badge on the right?), I'm going on a week long vacation with my friends this weekend, there is a wedding in my childhood town and I will visit that place after sooo long and yes, June is going to be a very very happening month. Yay!
• Lastly, wish thyself.

Happy birthday to me!

________

P.S: If anyone wants to send me a gift, tell me and I'll give you my address. Okay, thank you.. bye!

When my fears help me grow.

I don't remember how this fear entered my mind but I've always been scared of cockroaches. I know it is one of the most girly thing in the entire world but even if I hate to be a part of this category, I cannot help it. They are big disgusting insects and sometimes come with wings too. Why God why?!?? When I was in second grade, we shifted to a new city. My mom like always pestered me to meet new people of my size and be friends with them. They came to my place to play in the evening and I tried my best to make a good first impression by flaunting my big kitchen set and feeling proud with every 'ooh' and 'wow' reaction. But all my pride was washed away when a big cockroach entered my t shirt and I screamed in the highest pitch and jumped like a ninja making a complete fool of myself while the little people laughed incessantly. Though that broke the ice and gave me a wonderful childhood, my hatred and fear towards these freaky insects grew to a mountainous extent.

I fear deep dark waters too. I am a swimmer and I learned swimming when I was 6 or 7. Those were the days when I, a four ft. girl could play around with friends in a nine ft. deep pool, all day long and all night too. But as I grew up, this fear of deep dark waters started building up in my head and wrecked my swimming sessions. Now when I step into a pool, nobody in the world has the power to drag me to the deepest portion. I fear that someone might pull my legs from inside the pool and I would eventually drown. And that is perhaps, too much of Aahat (a horror series) etched in my mind.

Then there is fear of elevators. It is attributed to a heart-failing experience where I was with my parents in some old wobbly lift and after going up and down non stop for a couple of minutes, it got stuck somewhere in the middle. It was only when I bawled out and screamed, some people of that apartment came to our rescue. Yes, I was one hell of a screamer! Though I have recovered from the near death experience, I still sometimes fear stepping into an elevator when I am all alone.

Change. This is the most inevitable thing and yet I fear it the most. I fear change! It could be of any form. A change in my regular menu when I visit a restaurant, a change of place where I stay, a change of music that I listen to, a change of people that I like to be with, a change of dreams and aspirations and so on. My friends mock me because I fear to try new things in life. I try it when someone pesters me to but never on my own. And then I'm the one who wishes to travel the world and experience new things. How ironical! May be because somewhere in my mind I have this urge to conquer this fear. Yes, may be this is the reason.

When I am stuck in those days where I have nothing to work on, when I have no aim, no task to do, no movie to watch and no novel to read.. I use these fears and turn them into a purpose. Like stepping out of my comfort zone and be unprepared. A couple of weeks back, I went street shopping alone. I have never done that before and it was a big deal for me because I constantly need someone to fall back on. But that experience, oh it was different. I don't know good different or bad different, but it was something which I have never felt before. Standing alone in the middle of thousands of people and still not feeling depressed. Yes, it was different.

There are many more things that I fear and that scare the hell out of me but I think they are there just to give me a purpose when I lose one. So that makes them good, right! Except of course, cockroaches.

Anyway, you tell me. What are your fears?
_______

A Happy Day

My dad woke me up today, asking whether I would like to have Gajar ka Halwa. (For non-Indian readers, it's a very famous sweet dish whose main ingredient is carrot which is Gajar in Hindi) This being my favorite dessert, I readily yelled "Yes" from my room. But the next moment I wondered, that my mother is not at home, our maid has taken a leave for a week.. then who is going to prepare this super tasty thing? I jumped out of my bed and ran to the kitchen. To my very surprise, my dad was preparing it.

Before moving further, it is necessary to share that I hardly see my dad in the kitchen preparing some high class dish. He is there usually to keep a check..you know, on stuff..just like that!

So I being an opportunist, diligently assisted him and learnt the procedure. Yes, I finally know how to cook 'Gajar ka Halwa'. The best part is - for the rest of my life I can flaunt that it was my super dad who taught me this.

______

As mentioned above, our maid is on a leave, so these days I've been learning and doing a lot many household things. (A legit replacement..eh?) But tonight for a change, all five of us, including my brother and Frodo prepared dinner. Fine, Frodo was just watching! But the rest of us did prepare the supper together. It was such a warm and happy feeling, you know. When the whole family is together and we chat and we laugh and my brother tries to pull my leg and we laugh some more and the dog keeps wagging his tail.

Sigh.. it was just perfect!

______

But the day did not end there..

Today is Lohri. As a custom, we celebrate a bonfire night. Me and my mother went outside to get some pieces of wood for the bonfire. No doubt, it was a tiring thing to do in the cold. But the sweet outcome made it all worth it. We celebrated the festival.. again just the five of us.

And all I could think of was that this moment, right here, when the smiling faces of my loved ones are glowing in the light of bonfire, it is very special and I'm going to remember it forever.

:)

Thus, a happy day.

_______

P.S: A couple of days back, I recited my poems in front of some very amazing poets from all over the world. Being an introvert, I had never thought I would do something like this but everyone was so friendly and motivating there, that I grabbed my mobile, opened my blog and just like that..recited three of my poems. It was an impromptu decision but I thoroughly enjoyed it. Felt like having achieved something..not big or small, but something.. Yay!

27th of December it is.

Semester exams got over today. I am through with the 7th semester of Law (Still three more to go..gosh!) And also with the Game of Thrones. Yes, I finished all three seasons during my end semester exams, that is how gripping it is.

I don't like gore. I don't like excessive violence. I don't like to watch trauma or an hour long episodes, yet I finished it within two weeks. No wonder I have blind faith in the rating of imdb. However, I strongly believe it is no less then a sin to make the viewer wait for so long before the next season is aired and create a whole ambiance of unwanted suspense. I so want to know what happens next, right now! Ugh.

Perhaps this is one of the main reasons why novels are better than movies or serials.

Well, it is not going to give me any peace at the moment. But what might give me some peace is the fact that it is 27th of December again. I love, adore, cherish this date like hell. It is and shall always be super close to my heart. A little too sentimental na! Let's keep mum now.

Okay, I'm done blabbering.

Goodnight!

______

#Iamtotallyfreakedout.

Crazy things have happened lately. I came to know about a very devastatingly shocking news that an old batch mate of mine is getting married this November. I cannot put into exact words how I felt and why I gulped down my tongue, let alone saliva, on confronting the news. It was HUGE. (Just capslock was not enough, you see.)

The girl is, by birth, a year older to me. But this fact did not bring me any morsel of relief. I was paranoid for the whole day. Not that it is any wrong of her to get married. It's her life after all. What worried me was to digest the realization that we both were classmates, once upon a time. So if she is getting married then that means I have really grown up to the age where people get married.

And if this thought was not enough to ruin my day, my mother stepped in to make it worse. Being abso-effing-lutely dumb, I told the news to my mother, not taking note of the possibility that it could ignite a similar thought in my fickle-minded mother's head. So here comes the bigger part. She, very politely, presented the thought, which according to her was flawless. And it was to get her sweet little daughter (Me, you dumb ass!) married to some pretentious douche, AS SOON AS THE GRADUATION IS OVER.

#WTF.

I so thank god for having been blessed with an uber smart and caring elder brother who came to my rescue that day and not some guy on a white horse. (Taylor Swift has surely stained some pure innocent minds.) He gave my mother a good lecture embellished with reasons on why I shouldn't be forced to get married while I, during the whole drama, was running after Frodo for he had some unknown object in his mouth (And I don't know why Mr. Frodo is staring at me right now, all drenched. Is it raining? No, I think he has taken a bath.. .Finally!)

Though the good talk between my mother and brother came to an end, I have tiny little teeny weeny embers of the fiery thought flying in my head. They make me think that do my parents too believe in the age old cliche that we girls should be given to another family as soon as we step into our twenties? I am aware of the fact that they can't go against my wish or they can't force me. But what if I cave in to their wishes and demands out of societal pressure? Out of pressure of my whole khandaan (clan)? What if?

#Shudders

P.S: 1. If you find me babbling anywhere in the post or throughout the post, then not my fault because like I said I am totally freaked out. :P
2. I came to know that some xyz Punjabi aunty developed an interest in me for some guy in her family owning a BMW. Yes, that was his qualification. Huh! >_<
#Pretentiousdouche

Moments of the Day.

That feeling which you get after pestering your parents so hard to let you drive all by yourself and they, all of a sudden, agree to your request. You turn the ignition on and sit there for a while, trying to realize the actuality of the moment, feeling the rush of blood all through your body. You are so overwhelmed with the thought of driving independently, that you cradle sheer bliss within till you reach your destination - Delhi High Court (yes, it is 'the' thing to brag. :D ) And on returning home safely, you see your parents greet you with a big smile and how you are filled with the feeling of achievement.

And that is when I felt like a grown up, a responsible and a little 'independent' grown up.

That feeling, when after a heavy day you take a nap in the evening and wake up to the sound of monsoon showers. You rub your eyes and just before you know you find yourself standing in the balcony (I run fast...sometimes) with your arms stretched out and eyes tightly shut. To add more to the joy, your adorable dog runs out to you in the rain, wags a little and runs back. Oh! And does the same quite many times. :P

Yes, it is monsoon time in my dear city. And let me take the opportunity to add 'Finally' which is so credited to the long wait.

*HAPPY*

________________

P.S: I didn't want to spoil my happy happy post so I am asking it in this irrelevant space here. What the hell has happened to Bollywood music? Where is the 'music' in the songs like 'Main hu he nahi iss duniya ki'? FML!! Not that I listen to these pathetic compositions intentionally. But being surrounded by endless Bollywood lovers, I somehow end up giving my ears a bad ache. Every other song is adorned with horribly-raping-the-heart-of-music-lovers lyrics.

Sigh!

Anyway, listen to this song you lovely reader. An old song, I know. But it has got a timeless beauty. :-)

When It's All About Searching an Outlet.

It is bad. Everything around me is changing. 'Thing' not people. And why in the world does it make me swirl in disbelief that many of my favorite though mundane activities, are confronting their end? I don't want to sound typical when I say that things change or time change. But I do. Uhhh...am I PMSing or what? :|

The past two months i.e., April (the worst) and May greeted me within sudden ups and downs. They kept me busy with nth number of things. And now as I have put my feet in the month of June, Miss Life doesn't seem to be satisfied with a whole list of changing things. *Grumpy look* To begin with, my teenage ended. Though I don't miss being a teenager...AT ALL,(Gosh, I am a 20something blogger. Wuhooo!!!) it is undoubtedly a part of why I am being this way. 

Moreover, I am shifting to a new city i.e., Delhi. Now before you read further it is my duty to inform you that I AM a 'Delhi wali' by birth, heart, soul and by my whole khandaan (clan, to be clearer). Actually, I lived, not in Delhi but in NCR. So theoretically, in a few days, I would be lazying around at a new home in an entirely new city but practically, it doesn't matter. Phew! What matters is that my life here, in this little peaceful city is nearing its end. It makes my heart ache, big time, to bid goodbye to a whole era of my school and memories and friends and so on. It is usual to behave this way when something like this happens, I know. Because it is totally worth to feel sad about. The people here deserve it. Don't they? And so, this reason tops the list.

Moving on, my parents will complete 25 years of their togetherness in less than an hour. And I am so more than happy! Of course, I am. I have this whole surprise thing ready to be delivered early morning. All geared up for that. Oh by the way, this is totally unrelated to the not-so-important discussion about why I am so irked these days. I just thought to share. Ha!

So, the next thing which is irksome is the fact that I am not able to take off to some place cold while the temperature is soaring beyond its stupid limits. I have made some desperate efforts to convince my parents as well as my friends to make a trip. So far not so good. Sigh!

Well, this is it. The whole grumpy me has got a good little outlet. And I am all excited to celebrate the Silver Anniversary of the two most adorable people in my world.

See you later!

P.S: I will try to be more regular, my very sweet reader. Pinky swear! If I am not just know that I am PMSing again. *I am such a girl*. XD

And Cancer is a bitch. 

Perhaps I'm Too Naive.

It was supposed to be happy day. That is what I had thought when I woke up this morning. The morning light which was making its way through beautiful leaves had made me smile with complete awe shining in my eyes as I was gearing up for my exam. But getting into the details of what all happened today wouldn't help me right now.

Because I need to sort other important things. There is this whirlpool of tough chapters gushing in my head. It is colliding hard. And this is novel. Trust me! I have never been an escapist. I have never turned my back to situations which have the strength to make one hide beneath a facade of love and compassion. I have always believed in colouring the greyed walls and not repelling them. But this time, I feel more like an alien or rather an intruder in my own land. Like I might wake up to a morrow that I will never know. That no one would ever know.

And these questions, they are ringing too. Answer me! Will the Sun shine if I close my eyes and believe that it is the only thing in this whole goddamn world that can lighten up the emptied hole? And would it delete some parts which have occurred out of nowhere and caused great trouble to the little mind I have?

And what if I stand on the terrace of that big building and scream out loud something. Something which could easily free me of this unidentified pain by reaching the ears of someone. I don’t know. Would that work?

Sigh!

You know actually, a tight hug from you could work. Yes, that is the thing I want right now. Hey, you are listening right?

*****

Picture source : weheartit

Yabbaa Dabbaa Doo!!!

Dear Flintstones


Where did you guys go? I miss you and your 'Yabbaa Dabbaa Doo' sooooo much. And your other friends Dexter, Road Runner and Scooby Dooby Doo too.


I hope my internet speed remains good and stable. And I'll download you all as soon as my exams get over.
Watch out!


From
A girl who was born in the 90's.

A Letter To The One Reading It.

HELLO!

Firstly, I had a lot to tell but didn’t know who I should make my listener (apart from the obvious ones, silly) because there were a lot many things that I wanted to share. Yes, I repeat, a lot. So I thought to pen everything down here, with you because nobody is as patient as you are. See, you are actually taking out some of your valuable time and reading another one of my bakwaas (useless) posts.

THANK YOU!!!!! ^_^

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Did I tell you that I have now moved to a flat near my college with my friend’s elder sister? Actually it’s her relative’s house which is emptied for a year as they have gone to abroad. So we packed our bags, shifted here and became temporary residents of this place. It’s for the first time ever ever ever in the last 18 19 years that I got this much of freedom coupled with lot of responsibilities. So these days I’m in a process of becoming an independent lady. (How I love to be called as a lady. It sounds reputable, right?)  And my parents are also happy as their incorrigible daughter would now be more responsible. That is a good part.

^___^

And today is a wonderful day. I got one totally unexpected and a totally expected news. :P

The one totally unexpected news is that I got selected for my first moot court competition. (Last time it was a mere mock trial. Okay!)

YAYYYYYY!!!!!
*dances a little, shouts, screams, jumps and dances some more*

In case you don’t know what a moot court is read this for a very brief idea.

The other news is that I got selected in a dance group too, for a cultural programme in our college. This was super expected because I love dancing and being a true Gemini I am Jack of all trades and master of none. I have learnt many forms from Kathak to Salsa, from Jazz to Belly dance and so on. But trust me, I am not perfectly good in any of these. But I’m good enough to be a confident dancer.

Anyway, I’m really happy that finally there is something college-like taking place for us, students of Law. (It’s really depressing when all you have under the tag of extra-curricular activities is debates, moot courts (They are boring if you are not participating.), seminars, workshops etc. That’s it. :| )

And another good news is that I scored the highest in one of my subjects.

*can’t stop smiling*

What? Marks of other subjects? Umm..well..let’s move on to the next thing now.

And the last thing (Did you just sigh and said “Finally”?) which I want to share with you is that MUJHE DIWALI WALI FEELLING AA RAHI HAI (I feel the aura of Diwali). And I so so so love it!

The girl in the picture seems happy and content. And so am I. =)

Bye bye September! And October, what took you so long to reach? Huh? Don’t you know how badly I’m in love with you since the time I learnt that you bring along festivals and a good-good type feeling?

Anyway friend, I’m a little very tired. Had a hectic day na (Selection and all, you see.. :P ) So I should now sum it all up, quickly and get under my sheet for a nice nap. Actually there is not much to sum up. Is there?

Take care dost (friend).

Tata!

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Image source : Weheartit

A Metro Ride.

If you reside in Delhi or NCR and travel by Delhi Metro or if you want to travel by Delhi Metro then following are the points you should know because they are not announced but observed, felt and experienced:

1) While boarding metro from a station which is super-duper crowded, just stand in a line and leave yourself lose. You don’t have to make an effort to walk in respectably. Or better omit the word respectably because I don't want to sound ironic, you see. So, I was saying that leave yourself lose, the whole crowd will push you in and you'll flow like a stone in a current, hitting here and there, pushed, crushed and pulled. And in the end, you will be in the metro. Ta-da!

2) Apply the same technique while getting out of the metro. It works. But one very important thing to note here is that do NOT be the last one in the group of those getting down because there are people outside who are waiting to get in asap and you being the last one are the most prone to bear severe impacts on your body and your mind or there are even chances that you might not be able get out of the metro. (Both has happened to me and the experience of the former was so awful that it made me yell ‘Fuck Everyone’ while I was struggling to relieve my pulled hair and my bag which was stuck somewhere in between and I’d  thought I wouldn’t be able to get it back.) To avoid it, try to be in the middle.

3) If you are a girl and want to get a seat then prefer travelling in general coach rather than ladies’ compartment. Simply because females wouldn’t offer you their seat unless you are pregnant or old or some lady who can constantly stare with a don’t-you-have-manners-to-offer-me-your-seat expression at those sitting. On the other hand, men will offer you a seat most of the times (age no bar) because they are in a habit of doing the same since time immemorial.

4) Further, if you are travelling by ladies’ coach then there are chances that some aunty with dark red lipstick and a suit so bright that you might curse yourself for forgetting your shades, ask you to adjust a little to fit in her big bums in that tiny space. Result: after sometime, she would be comfortably sitting and gossiping on phone while you would be barely managing on the one hand space left.

5) People tend to forget who they are or where they are when they plug in earphones and play some pathetic bollywood song. To identify this category, work with your ears. If you hear some strange voice humming or worse, singing a heart-wrenching Hindi song, just try to bear it because you don’t have any other choice. Do you?

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I'm sure you must have realized how deep my connection with Delhi metro is. It is so strong that even in my sleeps I get bizarre dreams related to metro. :P

(Image Source: Google.)

I Can Talk of Anything and Everything.

Yeah, the title says it all. Actually, I have nothing special to share with you all today. Well, I know I'm a bore...and trust me, it's good to be one, sometimes though. ;)

Anyway, I just finished watching a movie..In Bruges. It was quite different. Dark Humour, as you call it. I don't usually watch such movies but I did because I had to. And I know, it doesn't make any sense. Right??? Uhh...never mind!!

So, about the movie, there were certain scenes where I had no idea whether I was supposed to to feel sad at the gravity of the situation or laugh at the serious yet unusually portrayed action. My emotions got confused and I ended up being neutral. Hmm...I know...silly me!! But on a whole, it was a good time pass. You can watch it if, like me, you have got nothing else to do and of course, if you want to have a good taste of dark humour.

Now to get over the tempo of the movie, I think the windy weather would help me. I just heard the *bang* of a door in the next room so I should better run outside (in my balcony, I mean) and enjoy the night. =)

Take care, folks!

P.S: And I hate the recently famous Chinese artificial and solar-powered plants that I see in almost every car of Delhi. It irks me to death. I mean, what relief do people get by looking at those constantly popping and dancing leaves in the middle of a traffic jam and that too on a scorching summer afternoon??? Well, I know it was completely out of topic. But as I said, I can talk of anything and everything. Ha.. :P :D

A Hope-Filled Letter 2

There is something I have to tell you. Trust me, it’s very hard but one day or the other, I have to say it to you. And that ‘something’ is that...... I’ve had enough of you, love. I need a break. I really do. Don’t take me wrong, dear. It’s just that you have no idea how much time I have wasted on you.

I accept that I was addicted to you, met you even thrice a day and spent so many hours, at a stretch with you. You were there for me when nobody else was. But hey, that doesn’t mean that I gave you the steering wheel of my life. So how could you take me for granted? Please don’t think that you can tempt me whenever you want to. You don’t own me and now don’t take me wrong here. It’s just that my love for you is pure but is unfortunately, stagnant too.

Anyway, it’s not your fault completely. I’m also at fault here because it was me who got hooked on to you. I should have stayed in my limits.

I know it’s useless to crib about what has already happened and also, I can’t bring back the time I have wasted but I can surely improve my situation. So from now on I am going to be less dependent on you. I might not even see you for a few days or a few weeks. I need to learn self-control and constructive spending of time. And I think, this should be my first place to begin from. I hope you would understand and co-operate with me. I hope you would not tempt me to visit you or see you every day or after every few hours. I hope you’d help me become a strong girl.

Don’t miss me much, Facebook!!

Love,

Vinati.

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P.S: To read my first hope-filled letter click here